So Emotional

This is a post that I have wanted to write but I am not sure how. Every time I have thought about writing it I start getting emotional. So, please be patient. And if you don't want to read my babblings that is okay too.
When Mark and I moved into our house 4 years ago he immediately got called to serve in young mens in our ward. My calling came 3 months later to serve in the young womens. I was so excited and scared. I wasn't much older than the girls I would be teaching, the laurels (16-18 year olds). I was 22 at the time. My young women leaders had shaped me into the woman I am and I knew I could do the same. How quickly I realized that they would be teaching me. I have been to 4 girls camps, temple trips, 5 youth conference trips, firesides, everything.
Well, almost 4 years later, 5 presidencies later, and 2 of my own children later I have been released from serving in Young Womens.

I cry every time I say that.

They truly have become such a big part of my life that I feel like part of me is missing. Part of my heart aches to be with them. Even though I was ready to be released and I had been inspired by the Holy Ghost that it was time it is still so hard for me. I have not had a day go by that I don't think about my girls. Some of them I consider to be such good friends. I know that they will be strong women in this world. They are capable of doing so much good. They have made me a better person.
Every once in a while I still shed a tear. Spencer has caught me on several occasions and keeps asking "Are you sure your ok mommy?" I keep telling him I will be. At least I get hugs without asking from my sweet boy. Maybe I should cry more often ;) I hope that as I move forward to my next calling, whenever and whatever comes, that I will be up to the challenge. For now, I will try to sit in Relief Society and soak in being spiritually fed from new people. Three weeks before I got released this quote was in the lesson I gave.

"I believe in revelation—and so do you—and I believe that the Lord is getting acquainted with you right now. You missionaries that are preparing to go on your mission, do not let one day go by on your mission when you do not demonstrate to the Lord that you are reliable, that you are trustworthy, that you are dedicated, that you are committed, that you are on his side, for he is getting acquainted with the young men and the young women of this Church today. … Every day of your life he gets acquainted. Then, after he has watched you and after you have demonstrated your faithfulness by your service and by your ability to keep your priorities straight in your life, along comes a need for a high councilor, a Primary president, a Relief Society president, a bishop, or a stake president; and the Lord makes it known to the responsible priesthood leader that you are ready because you have lived up to the commitments and promises that you made before you were ever born."
~M. Russell Ballard

That quote hit my heart strings. I knew things were going to change soon. I knew that I had some things to work on and that quote said exactly what I needed. I know that the Lord expects me to be preparing. To demonstrate my faith. To keep my priorities straight. So, this is me resolving to be better. To do better.

I'm Alive

The founder of the scrapbooking company I work for answered the following question:

"I love to scrapbook and preserve my family's memories, but it seems like I am always behind. Seriously, I take way too many pictures and still have 5+ years of events to scrap. I don't scrap every picture or every event, but still there are so many events and fun memories I want to capture. How do I do it? Are your scrapbooks up to date and current? If so, what is your secret?"

This is the last paragraph of her answer:

"Mostly, rather than feeling overwhelmed by lots of unscrapbooked photos, I feel happy knowing I have them: beautiful pictures, beautiful memories, all waiting for me to relive during the creative process. Having many photos to scrapbook doesn't mean I'm behind, it means I'm ALIVE."

Amen Jeanette! Thank you for having the right words that describe my life. And to prove I am alive...






How thankful I am to have such a beautiful family. I am truly blessed.

On a side note: we will be painting our shed this weekend. Pictures to come.

Mark is Not Allowed

This past weekend was a BLAST! We went up to my parents in Salt Lake for our annual Staycation Vacation. It was relaxed but full of fun. Of course I left all packing until Friday morning because last Thursday was all about Spencer turning THREE! More on that when I upload my pictures. Thursday night at 10:30 I started running 3 loads of laundry (I get up with Katherine anyways three times a night). Friday morning I woke up at 6:30 and started folding. (Side note: why is laundry such a necessary evil? I need to invent something that cleans your clothes while they hang in your closet) Mark got up 10 minutes before he had to leave for school (men.) and said his classes were getting out early so he would come home and put everything in the car and finish packing if I would get him a list. So I did just that and he was the hero.

When I got to work I emailed him a detailed list. Said list included things like: Katherine's diapers, swim diapers, swimsuit, socks, my glasses, Spencer's hat, so on and so forth. (I hadn't hardly packed for Katherine because she was still sleeping when I left for work). Details. I am so detailed when it comes to my lists of what I need for a weekend away from home (even though going to my parents is like a second home.). Mark got out of class, went home, packed and came to work to pick me up.

I thought to ask "did you remember Katherine's swimsuit?"
Mark "No. I don't know where you keep them."
Me "Couldn't you call to ask me?"
Mark "She doesn't need a swimsuit."
Me "what about her socks?"
Mark "she will be ok."

After several more rounds of did you get this and NO responses I rushed out the door extremely upset. If I put something on the list, I want it with us. Four days of play with cousins, one family picture session (the first since Spencer was 1), swim party, birthday party, etc all needed supplies from our house. We probably don't need everything I take but you never know. It is a really good thing I went home too because when I opened the door the first thing I saw (besides piles of laundry that got folded and not put away) was the bag I packed with his clothes and my clothes. He would have been in the dog house all weekend if I hadn't had my clothes, shower items, make-up, shoes, cell phone charger and everything else that was in that bag.

So, Mark is not allowed to pack for trips. Period. Never again. He has never packed well. For our wedding, he forgot church shoes. For our honeymoon he didn't pack any clothes (shopping spree for him). His first campout with Spencer, no clothes for himself; only clothes for Spencer because I packed Spencer's bag. Nope. Mark is Not Allowed to pack.

Side note: he also is not allowed for the girls weekend I am planning with my sisters and mom in October. Neither are my kids. Either one. I am super excited! First girls weekend ever!